We were so happy just to go to the movies and hold hands, something we hadn't done in ages. Don't those sound like good things to have in your marriage, too? The truth is, you never know how strong your relationship is until it's tested.
"Happy couples are each other's haven," says Holland. All too often, the stress of a crisis can pull a couple apart.
Step 5: Find a balance between time for two and time for you. "There are couples that are never apart and there are couples that see each other only on weekends," Greer says.
But you also have enough time together to feel your connection as a strong tie rather than as a loose thread.
Your togetherness needs will also change over time, so you'll have to shift your balance accordingly.
With the right balance, neither partner feels slighted or smothered.
You have enough non-shared experiences to fire you up and help you maintain a sense of yourself outside the relationship — not to mention give you something to talk about at the dinner table.
Couples that fight right also find ways to defuse the tension, says Wile — often with humor.